[anzac] "AD for an APOSTLE" - Bryan Hupperts

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From: "REVIVAL List" <prophetic@...>
Date: Fri, 17 Feb 2006 12:01:05 -0600
NOTE:  Over the next month leading up to the 'GATHERING' we
may feature a few pieces by several of the speakers. Bryan
Hupperts has written many humorous yet thought-provoking
articles over the years. Please see-  http://www.revivalschool.com
for details about the 'Gathering' if you are interested.

"AD for an APOSTLE"
-by Bryan Hupperts. (Jan 23, 2003).

My Dear Son,
After reviewing the advertisement copy you intend to place in the
Jerusalem Post, I feel a few corrections are in order. While yes,
God is certainly looking for a few good men and women to serve
as Apostles, your job description is a tad misleading. Allow me to
bring some apostolic correction.

First, you have written: Be An Apostle of God, See The World!

Certainly this is true. Apostles have Trans local ministries and do
travel. I seldom stayed anywhere for more than 6 months during
my ministry. The arrest warrants were great motivators to help me
keep moving! However, you neglected to mention that most of this
world tour will be as a prisoner in chains, seen through the
peepholes of slave ships, often spent in royal prisons waste deep
in human excrement fighting the rats for scraps of food. Describing
the perks of the job as Exotic, while technically true, is disingenuous.

Next, you wrote: Have God's Power! Do Miracles! The Marks Of
An Apostle Can Be Yours!

Again, this is all true. However, you neglect to mention that the
crowds you wow today with divine authority will flog you, stone you,
and often crucify you the next day. Remember that Jesus is the
Chief of all Apostles and for heaven's sake, look what happened to him!

While the marks of an Apostle are, according to 2 Corinthians
12:12, "Signs and wonders and mighty deeds, wonders, and
miracles," you deftly failed to mention that the marks of an Apostle
are also on his back. I wrote in 1 Corinthians 4:9-13, "For I think
that God has displayed us, the apostles, last, as men condemned
to death; for we have been made a spectacle to the world, both to
angels and to men. We are fools for Christ's sake, but you are
wise in Christ! We are weak, but you are strong! You are
distinguished, but we are dishonored! To the present hour we both
hunger and thirst, and we are poorly clothed, and beaten, and
homeless. And we labor, working with our own hands. Being reviled,
we bless; being persecuted, we endure; being defamed, we entreat.
We have been made as the filth of the world, the offscouring
(scum) of all things until now."

I don't know where anyone gets the idea we are supposed to be
hopping about in private jets, taking royal cruises with the latest
CCM musical flavor of the month, and hobnobbing with celebrities.
I was facing beasts at Ephesus, the perils of robbers, the sword,
stoning, false brethren, shipwrecks, and the always-present danger
of the heresies of self-appointed Super Apostles! Where do these
people get off with this? The call to Apostleship is a non-
commutable death decree! Remember the Cross?

Please rework your Apostolic ad copy to include these words:
condemned to death, spectacles, fools for Christ, weak, dishonored,
hungry and thirsty, poorly clothed, beaten, homeless, reviled,
persecuted, defamed, filth of the world, and don't forget the tag line
from my ministry business card, "scum of the earth." These are
the terms you've left out of your Madison Avenue Apostolic Ministry Ad.

One of my personal favorite verses penned by my ever-faithful
traveling companion Luke is Acts 21:32. "He immediately took
soldiers and centurions, and ran down to them. And when they
saw the commander and the soldiers, they stopped beating Paul."
They stopped beating me. Oh, the countless joys of my calling!

You might consider rewording the Retirement Plan portion as well.
While the eternal aspects of ruling and reigning with Christ are
truly beyond description, still, that bit about touring the Coliseum
in Rome hurt. Many of my friends were martyred there, mauled to
death by beasts, used as lambs for the slaughter in the gladiator
games, sometimes being tied to posts, set on fire, and used as
human torches while they died screaming and worshipping in the flames.

The call to be an Apostle of the Lord Jesus is a clarion call to
service, hardship, and death. While the truth might not sell well on
Madison Avenue, it will certainly separate the wolves from the Shepherds.

Love to all from your favorite ambassador in chains,

The Apostle Paul.
~Bryan Hupperts © 2003